Professor of Happiness
Hi and welcome to my website. I am a Professor of Happiness by choice.
After graduating in Science and Mathematics from Bengaluru University, I took up a job in ESI Corporation. About 20 months later, switched over to Life Insurance Corporation of India looking for better prospects. Lured by the charm of H R Training, resigned the job in LIC of India in Nov 2007. Concerned by the increasing criminalization of the youngsters in the age group of 15 to 22, took to counseling students in 1993. To help them out, had to train them in Study techniques, Examination Day blues, Self Management in the fields of Goal setting, Stresss Management, Anger Management, Fear Management, etc. Gradually this converted me into a HR Trainer. When the weight of the lure of the HR Training increased, freedom to work in that line appeared to be the source of Happiness. It is, indeed.
In my younger years, I was exposed to variety of creative activities. After a few years of this exposure, I was actively involved in the Youth Hostel Movement and the Film Society activities. I carried out these activities till the end of 1991, when my transfer in the professional life deeply affected the life style. I took to writing and became a writer at the age 19. Several articles on various topics are published in various Kannada news papers and periodicals. Also ran a students helpline column for 5 years in Kannadigara Prajanudi from Mysore. Two books on parenting, Makkalu Beleyuththiddaare Echcharike and Makkalannu Bayyuvudu hege, two biographical sketches on Jatindra Mohan Sen Gupta and T Prakasham and one book for neo literates on Life Insurance – all in Kannada are published. Also, produced and presented several programmes over All India Radio.
Series of TV interviews were also telecast. Currently, I am a helping hand for many a needy persons in overcoming emotional disturbances, relationship problems, marital discards etc. But students remain my main concern. I am proud to place on record saving of seven young lives from suicide in the last two decades.
HAPPINESS is a great gift but less used. Being happy is an art. We pursue those goals which take away our happiness.
In Karnataka and Andhra Pradesh, there is a special custom while celebrating new year – Ugadi, that of eating neam leaves which are very bitter with jagery, which is very sweet, both together. While chossing these two together to eat, people are very careful to chose as less neam leaves as possible, taking the sweet jaggery more. But when it comes to real life, people keep seeking the bitter neam!
Acceptance of what cannot be changed, right interpretation of experiences, understanding statements from the others perspective, sustaining frustrations, overcoming disappointments, sticking to goals amid failures, maintaining good human relationship, leading a valuable life are some of the essentials to remain happy. The pages within may provide some insight into these aspects.
Wish you happy living!
Other Notable Literature:
- Yaake Heegadtharo - behaviour analysis book
- Akashakke Yeni Haki - Motivational guidance book to become achievers in life
- Samayavannu Kollabedi, Please - Time Management book
- Pareekshe, Nanagenu Bhaya - Handbook for students on Managing examinations
- Makkalu beleyuthidare echarike - Guidance book for parents for managing teenage children
- Makkalannu Bayyuvudu Hege - Guidance book for parents for managing children up to 10 years
- Jatindra Mohan Sen Guptha
- T. Prakasham - both biographical booklets
- Jeeva Vime A booklet for neo literates on Life Insurance
Many people attach importance to quantity rather than quality. Besides, you have to UNLEARN two lessons driven home since child hood. One, that examinations are very important and two, you have to score excellent marks in your examinations. Yet another aspect you need to unlearn is scoring good marks can help you become successful in life. This is a pure myth. Examinations and marks are important only to some extent. What is most important is LEARNING. If you study, for examinations, for marks, when you are studying your mind would be more focused on whether that topic will appear in your exam, whether you would remember the answer, whether you can score good marks. As such, you would be unable to grasp what you are studying, making you panic.
Instead, if the focus is on learning, panic will not haunt you. You will not forget what you have learnt and you can answer any question without any difficulty. Therefore, quality and learning are to be attached importance. Concentration level gets diluted after about 90 minutes or so. You need to take breaks. Proper distribution of subjects in study pattern helps avoid boredom. When you prepare time table for studies, remember to add one or two hours in the time table FOR WASTING. Unknowingly, without any efforts on your part, some time gets wasted. Making a provision for this in your time table helps you manage your time better.
Studying aloud or studying mentally, waking up early or sitting up late are individual choices, depending on one’s comfort levels. Studying should be an enjoyment, not a punishment. For more details, read "Study Techniques", "Examination Day Blues"
Parenting is a tough task, indeed. Problems arise in parenting children, problems being different at different stages of the growth of the children. What is essential is the kind of parental attention and guidance a child receives during its formative years. At this stage, the child learns a lot from what it observes – how much attention the parents give, how the parents treat each other, how other family members behave, how do elders quarrel, levels of honesty displayed by elders, moral values followed by the family, etc. In some cases, inheritance of some qualities from elders also plays an important role in moulding the character of the child.
As the child starts growing up, the influence of the teachers also plays an important role. Whether the child grows up as an asset to the society or as a liability depends on kind of pampering the child received while growing up. When children reach the stage of adolescence, the changes in the body, in the mind influence them strongly. They firmly believe that they are GROWN UPS but parents may continue to treat them as BABIES. This creates conflict. Understanding the mind set of the teenagers is essential. They behave as grown ups some times and some times as children. Parents should be prepared to change their reaction accordingly. Imparting values, teaching self discipline, making the child self managing are important.
It may be startling to know that only about 4 percent of the fathers give attention to their children. Whereas a mother can ensure that the child Is physically and morally healthy, the father can ensure that the child nurtures dreams and works to realize them. Parenting is a complex task no doubt, but is a duty to be performed. Duty to the child, duty to the society.
Many a time we feel hurt, putting us emotionally down. Some times, long after the incident has happened, we keep crying over it. It prevents us from right use of your wisdom and talent to realize our dreams. Proper management of hurt is essential. We may be hurt when we get some thing opposite to what we expected. Wrong assumptions, wrong interpretations of incidents or actions and statements by other people, needless importance given to ego, inability to analyse issues etc. all cause hurt in us. If we cope with hurt, we can ensure that our focus on the task on hand remains unaffected.
For more, read "Hurt Management".
Romance is a great feeling. Romance between persons, before marriage, after marriage, romance with a cause, romance with scenery, oh! There are so many types of romance you enjoy. But what really hurts many is romance between people. Relationships break because of differences. Or do they? Differrences are bound to exist as two people need not think the same way. Accepting existence of differences and find solutions where essential are the cures for the ills created by differences in relationships.
Marriage is not a contract, where, you in return to certain gains, would do certain things. When GAIN becomes the focus of marriage, discards galore. Love, Trust and Self restraint are essential for any marriage to remain sacred, said Gandhiji. They hold good, much more so, these days!